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Post by Cat-Girl Ayame on Jan 23, 2004 14:37:36 GMT -5
Live via satellite comes Ayame, who is still at the MST3K party*
*sniff* that was BEAUTIFUL Terd. It brings a tear to my ocular receptors.
Anyway, as you can probably see, I am reporting LIVE from one of the final Mystery Science Theater 3000 parties before the show leaves the air two Saturdays from now (that's the 31st of January). As you can see behind me, the party is in full swing and boasts not only hardcore MST-fans, but several (by which I mean hundreds) of the b-grade actors, directors, and bands from the various episodes. *camera pans left* You can see here with me is Mr. Lee Van Cleef. Some of you may remember him as the ninja master from "Master Ninja I".
Ayame: So, how are you enjoying the party Mr. Van Cleef? Lee Van Cleef: It's excellent. I have conquered many shrimp kababs this day. A: That's swell. So, how do you feel about the final episode's approach? LVC: It is surely a sign that the ancient ninja clan has followed me from Japan. A: I uh...don't think that has anything to do with this. LVC: Nonsence. the ninja is the answer to all. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to flip around and walk on a tightrope until I kill ninjas.
Yes. And over here we have Krankor from Prince of Space.
A: Well Mr. Krankor, how are you finding the party? Krankor: It's a splendid swaree. mah-weh-weh-weh-weh. A: I suppose it is... K: A gala of wonder. mah-weh-weh-weh-weh. A: uh yeah...but I was wondering... K: A precarious presumtious presumable pangeic productive engagemet. mah-weh-weh-weh-weh-weh.
*Ayame is exasperated*
back to you in the studio...
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Post by Tay Mation on Jan 23, 2004 20:22:48 GMT -5
Thanks Ayame Tay here, with nothing to report...uh...Traffic...good...the freeway is almost complety fixed. So good news for those people who have been trying to get from bountiful to Provo, and only know the way of the free way. In a week, your road will be fixed. Thats all for Traffic. Now to Rev. Rev?
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Post by Moero on Jan 26, 2004 14:27:38 GMT -5
((OOC: Hahah... Who would actually WANT to go to Provo? anyway, check this out: sparky.youaremyfriend.com))
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Post by Rev on Jan 26, 2004 16:17:33 GMT -5
This is Rev, reporting from the middle of some gang related street. I've been investigating the reports of some unusual supernatural activity here and-
Some Gang Guy: Hey b****, give me your money.
Excuse me.
*turns around and shoots Gang member in the forehead*
Sorry about that. I'll bring you more as information comes.
*Gang member's head begins growing back*
Uhhhh, which may be sooner than you think.
*end footage*
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Post by Moero on Jan 26, 2004 18:37:44 GMT -5
*cut to Moero, in some smoky, dust-filled, indiscernable area. She is splattered with blood and mud and her hair is looking somewhat dissheveled. She had a few superficial, though smoking cuts*
Hello crew. First, let's all look on the positive side by noting that today has been the warmest in nearly two weeks, a mere 5 degrees below freezing. Also, the 11th plague, also known as fog, has finally been lifted.
Unfortunately, that is a sad comparison to what I will know reveal to you. If you'll recall, late last year there was a rainfall of spaceship. Now it seems to be repeating, but much heavier and more widespread.
*she pauses, lifts her gun and shoots at something offscreen. A deathscream is heard.*
These ships do not come uninhabited. I suspect they were using the fog as cover for their presence in the skies, and now that their cover has diminished, they are landing with an intent that I don't intend to find out.
*there is another blast and antoher deathscream*
Back to you in the studio.
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Post by TerdBurgler on Jan 26, 2004 19:53:23 GMT -5
This is Terd Burgler here with urgent and pressing news. Aliens have begun their invasion of the world as we know it. Under the cover of fog, which has covered most of the world for the past, uh, really long time, they have assembled just above the cloudy mass to plan their attack. When the fog unexpectedly lifted last night, the alien plan was put into action as they landed in all the key strategic areas needed to keep this world safe.
They have been reported to have landed all over the world in Sydney, London, Moscow, Madrid, Buenes Ares, Mexico City, Tokyo, Washington DC, and oddly enough, Provo. These aliens seem to have the most common of objectives for aliens of these type, which is to basically say that they either want to eliminate mankind entirely, enslave the human race, or they can't find a good cup of coffee. *glares offscrene at Tay*
As aliens continue to run rampant throughout the world, people all over are taking a stand. The UN has come together with all other world-powers in an attempt to stop them, birds of all varieties have staged attacks, florists of all shapes and sizes have donned arms, and this newsroom is ready to rock! On another note, I don't think I'll be participating much in this one. My health insurrance is running low. But rest assured, as long as I live, the news will continue to be reported!
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Post by Cat-Girl Ayame on Jan 27, 2004 0:12:13 GMT -5
ALIENS IN TOKYO?!?!
*becomes enraged and starts glowing red* NOW THEY'VE GONE TOO FAR!
*Flies straight up through the ceiling and heads for Tokyo.*
Don't worry, I have a camera and I'll cover my descimation of their race!
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Post by Moero on Jan 27, 2004 18:24:19 GMT -5
*footage is now shown of Moero pointing her gun at some unseen ojbect offscreen. The angle is canted and the view is fuzzy, but it's there all right.*
I grow tired of your incessant deathscreams! What do you want with this pathetic planet? TALK!
*using the intergalactic translator she stole from Rev, a pained and unearthly voice is heard*
Pained and unearthly voice: Ayame....
*Moero blasts at the pained and unearthly being, then glances up toward the camera*
Hey, who turned that o--
*end feed*
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Post by TerdBurgler on Jan 27, 2004 21:32:25 GMT -5
And that's all we've been getting all day. I am unaware of the condition of the outside world being that I haven't left the newsroom in over three days. Or at least, I THINK it's been three days. As for the outside feeds, we keep getting short scrambles of what seems to be activity in a very eratic and unreliable way. We have yet to get a complete report from anyone on the outside world, so I'm pretty much stumped. But as far as we here can tell, there are still some people alive and kicking, especially those here at Newscast. I'm pretty sure they're having a pretty good time.
As for me, like I said, I haven't left here at all, and thereby I have no idea what the outside world looks like anymore. I fear that when I exit, I will walk into some alien landscape where green, bug-eyed creatures rule. So hey, if you viewers out there are still alive and have access to a phone, please, call in and desribe it to the world. That's the news for now. I'm gonna go back into solitude, rumaging through old coffee and soda machines in hopes to find a friend. You never know where they may be hiding.
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Post by Cat-Girl Ayame on Jan 27, 2004 22:40:47 GMT -5
*Incoming Feed*
Hi everyone. This is Ayame live in Tokyo where, as you can see, the aliens are attacking. Though the battle is far from over, the Japanese military has been making significant steps forward in repelling the alien threat. Yours truly has joined in the fight, and I am currently serving in the "cute but powerful" batallion alongside the Sailor Senshi, NukuNuku, Lina Inverse, Naga, and some creepy guy who plays Dance Dance Revolution a lot. If you look to the left of me, you'll see Godzilla, Gamera, and Mothra attacking their left flank. They have had to fall back twice however due to the abnormal ammount of Regenerator G-1 that they are pumping down to the surface of the Earth.
*looks offscreen*
Ah, okay! My group has just been given the orders to move out and defend Tokyo Tower, arguably the most renowned and magical place in Japan. I'll send another message as soon as we arrive!
Ayame, over and out.
*end feed*
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Post by Sparky the Dog on Jan 28, 2004 21:23:51 GMT -5
well for some reason you the viewers have decided that you want me to do a report about the superbowl so i will be getting on a plane tomorrow to go to a superbowl party in new england (wherever the hell that is) and so i will be taking a camera and doing review after every quater and dont worry people i will be intercepting the cbs satilite so you wont have to worry about changing the channels and i have also been requested to do a review of the survivor allstar episode that is fowllowing the superbowl
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Post by Rev on Jan 29, 2004 15:43:40 GMT -5
This is Rev, reporting from the front lines of London, where the alien invasion has become increasingly more powerful. Luckily, I've been testing my brand new "Loser Launcher." Here is a demonstration:
*Alien deathtank is seen driving towards Rev*
First, as you can see, the aliens menacingly drive towards me in an effort to prove their dominance. Once they have reached the special blue 'X' on the ground, I push this button. *holds up control* Watch.
*Deathtank drives onto 'X', which turns out to be a mega-catapult* *Deathtank is now out of sight*
If you'd like to see where they are now, let's switch it over to the Studio satellite in orbit.
*shot changes to deathtank floating towards the sun at a very fast speed*
So far, I've destroyed 17 tanks, 23 ground units, and even a hovercraft. Back to you in the studio.
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Post by TerdBurgler on Jan 29, 2004 17:59:51 GMT -5
Wow Rev, that's terribly impressive. I would have expected such an invention out of Tay. Well, here in the studio, things have been pretty quiet. I've only had to shoot four people, one of which being Freddy here, who is constructed entirely out of lint. He doesn't talk much. And I suspect the other three were ninjas, but you never can be sure about them. Although several alien war-shipps have been sighted overhead, they don't seem to be bothering me. Most of them head to Provo where Moero continues to do what she does best. If you look out the window, you can see the decimation of- Kaboom! OH MY GOODNESS! It's seems that the studio has been grabbed by a tractor beam and is now being pulled up away from the ground! From what I can tell, the alien Mother ship has flown over and is now trailing several buildings behind it via tractor beam, this very studio included! And I was hoping to go home early today. Don't worry folks, I know how to handle this. Just give me a sec. This is Terd Burgler signing out.
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Post by Sparky the Dog on Jan 29, 2004 18:43:23 GMT -5
*Live Via satilite on airplane*
well due to some computer malfunctions my tickets got messed up and i am on my way to Venisuala. from there i will make a switch onto a plane too brazil, then its to mexico. then its to canada and then its finaly of to new england luckly i am the only one on the plane now besides the camera guy *camera pans around the plane to show all of these dead corpses and blood stains every where* anywho in entertainment news everything sucks
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Post by Cat-Girl Ayame on Jan 29, 2004 19:26:35 GMT -5
*static*
This is Ayame coming in live from Tokyo Tower, where, despite the best efforts of me and my team, the aliens are beginning to advance. You can see behind me, Sailor Moon has perched herself on the top of the tower with the other Sailor Scouts positioned 360 degrees around the base, and are using thier combined power to form a forcefield. We hope that this will keep the tower from being taken but already the scouts are showing signs of fatigue. Lina and Naga have spent most of their time arguing about who is paying them afterwords and the ratio payment is to be accepted. NukuNuku is leaping about from war-machine to war-machine like...well...an android with a cat brain....but she's just not doing enough damage! We haven't seen the Dance-Dance guy since he spotted a DDR machine and left us to play about 6 blocks behind the alien line. In summary, we need re-enforcements! Tokyo is FALLING much like Helms Deep in Lord of the Rings...like Hoth in The Empire Strikes Back...Like Raccoon City in the beginning of Resident Evil 3 and the film Resident Evil: Apocalypse! Hold on...
*talking to someone off camera*
what did they say? they did WHAT?!?
*back to camera*
This just in, the government of France has just been overthrown in a scene which resembled "Mars Attacks" to the letter.
We may not be a match for them, but I am not giving up! ATTICA! ATTICA!
*Grabs Elendil from off camera and charges back into the battle. Camera shows the Sailor Scouts' forcefield flicker before the feed ends*
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