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Post by Sparky the Dog on Jan 31, 2004 21:42:20 GMT -5
*from plane again* Well i am finaly on the plane to new england. whever the hell that is. but anywho it is just not right for me to be on camera and not give a review so i will review the inflight movie. the inflight movie wa--is The Stapler staring rob schnieder. it is about a lowly business man named rob who treats staplers like crap so this gypsy puts a curse on him and turns him into a gaint stapler. and he has to go on in life trying to make it as a sta-- *intercom breaks in* this is your captain speaking and we seem to have lost both of our wings somehow and we our all going to die have a nice day. Well folks it appears that i am going to die so i wont finish this review back to you in the studio *the camera shows the camera man taking the last parachute and jumping from the plane with sparky still on the plane then from the outside shows the plane spiriling down to the ground and creating a big explosion. feed ends*
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Post by Cat-Girl Ayame on Feb 1, 2004 14:22:11 GMT -5
*static* *Ayame appears on the screen looking tired and beat up*
cough...cough...
This is Ayame, reporting in from Tokyo. *static* have finally begun to recede. We've *static* to defend Tokyo Tower. However, some attribute this to the Super Bowl today. I won't be watching it cause I don't like football. Instead, I'll be taking in a screening of Return of the King with Sailor Saturn and Sailor Moon. The battle is set to resume tommorow.
*gets handed something*
this just in....SPARKY'S PLANE CRASHED?!? NOoOOOOoOoOoOoOooOOoOOOoOOoOO!
Eeww. Hillary Duff. If Sparky was alive, he could violate her airspace. Moero? Could you please kill Hillary Duff for me? If not kill her, maybe just ruin her singing and acting career? Thanks.
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Post by Sparky the Dog on Feb 1, 2004 20:36:44 GMT -5
hello news veiwers out there this is frito the s.o.b. im sparkys cousin the news station has asked me to come on the show to do a tribute to Sparky the Dog but minutes before we started we recieved this footage from sparkys plane. so lets take a look.
(*starts out with some tv snow. then shows the pile of wreckage that is sparkys plane. when a dark figure emerges from the wreckage*
who would have thought that those black boxes are hollow and have enough room for a mid size dog. Oh! hello folks sparky the dog here i seem to have been covered black from the crash anywho the party im supposed to go to is not far from here so ill talk to ya later)
and that would be the footage sparkys satalite connection was lost in the wreckage so everything has to be shipped so with that all the football and survivor reviews will be showed later tonight. back to someone else. this is frito signing out
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Post by TerdBurgler on Feb 2, 2004 13:21:39 GMT -5
This is Terd Burgler in the floating news station. As of yet, I still haven't found the anti-tractor beam generator. I checked the attic and the second attic, with no luck. Too many of Tays recent inventions got in the way of me seeing anything. Having been lost up there for the past two days, I'm not entirely sure where I am anymore. There's a McDonalds floating next door to me, so luckely, I haven't had an appetite for food at all. Additionally, there's been a starbucks floating next to that, so I haven't wanted to drink anything either.
I'm here in the control deck, were my last hope for finding the stupid anti-tractor beam lays. But there are so many buttons, and I have no idea how to work them! That's Tay's job! Well, here goes. *presses a red button* "They call me Dr. worm Good morning, how are you? I'm Doctor Worm I'm interested in things I'm not a real Doctor..." Uh oh, that's a good song, but it means bad things. *presses a blue button* "Excuisit dead guy Lookins straight at me Buh buh dup buh buh ba dup buh Buh buh dup buh buh ba dup buh Buh buh dup buh buh ba dup buh..." OH NO! that one's worse! *slams another button* "Make a hole with the gun perpendicular To the name of this town in a desk top world Exit wound in a foreign nation..." Hey, I like that one. *reluctantly presses a black button* "...permenently disco. Everyone is dressed so oddly I cannot recognize I can't tell the staff from the customers Baby check this out I got something to say MAN It's so loud in here!..." I'll have to press that one on friday nights. *tries another* "Tractor Beam, disengaged." Oh, that's good. "I'm your little friend, I'm not your only friend, but I'm a little glowing friend, but really, I'm not avtually your friend but I am..." Hmmm, I wonder why it's doing THAT one? "Blue canary in the ally by the light swith Who watches over you! Make a little birhouse in your soul..." I'm sure that one means really bad things "There's a picture opposite me Of my primitive ancestry..." I think it has something to do with danger... "Who stood on rocky shores And kept the beaches shipwreck free..." Something along the lines of death... "Though I respect that a lot I'd be fired if that were my job..." Oh yes, now I remember! "After killing Jason-" KASPLOOSH!!! It means we're falling! Well, it seems that I'm in the ocean now, folks. Don't worry, this has happened before. Now, what happened to that oversized motorboat engin? Looks like Team Terd Burgler's blasting off agaaaaaaaaaaaain!
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Post by Moero on Feb 2, 2004 14:40:49 GMT -5
*Cut to Moero.* From War of the Worlds to the Martian Chronicles, to Mars Attacks, mankind has always feared offensive life forms from another planet; namely Mars. Well I'm here to tell you that these aliens are not from Mars. Do you really think aliens like these are from a male planet? These are from Eris, a small planet circling Bellatrix, a star located in the constellation Orion. Just as destructive as Martians, but in a female way. And I've gone through some female negotiations. *clip of Moero offering some of them chocolate* That caused a bit of a sugar high, but the chocolate was poisoned. And even if the poison doesn't work, there's always the sugar low to deal with. So while doom and destruction are raining down on this, remember: Chocolate cures everything.
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Post by Sparky the Dog on Feb 2, 2004 22:38:39 GMT -5
High Folks Frito her. its late but we just recieved the review of the superbowl and the survivor all stars
*fuzzy snow. then sparky covered in black soot appears in a room full of angry patriot fans*
well it seems that everyone here thinks im a panther for some reason so i will be leaving *sparky tries to leave but fans stop him and then bound and gag him*
Pf1: your not going anywhere panther
me: hmmghhhhhhffffffffffffffftohmmmmmmmmmmm
Pf2: lets through him in the pool
pf3-115: YEAH
*with that sparky is throughn into a pool and becomes clean*
Pf1: hey hes not a panther he is that dog that came to review the game
*sparky is then pulled out of the water and untied and ungagged and they watch the game together*
me: well the patriots won by 3 and survivor was lacking, these people are supposed to be the best of the best but they have gotten more stupid since they have been on the show it is sickining sparky out
*end transmission*
Well folks sparky should be back by tomorrow and i will be gone so fair thee well
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Post by Cat-Girl Ayame on Feb 3, 2004 0:25:08 GMT -5
Wait....if all the aliens are female...then can't we just point them to the nearest mall? Wait a minute...I'M at the mall...and I'M AN ALIEN....weird.
Anyway, I am suprised Sparky didn't talk about the....suprising....halftime show where Justin Timberlake pulled the left breast piece off Janet Jackson's outfit. I was....shocked to say the least. But it goes without saying that yesterday's bowl game was the most exciting moment of 98% of Americas' lives. Sad really.
Course, at the time I was at the movies seeing the Ashton Cutcher oddball "The Butterfly Effect".
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Post by Sparky the Dog on Feb 3, 2004 17:55:14 GMT -5
*door flies open and sparky enters wheeling in a keg with a hose from the tape to his mouth.*
IM BAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCK EVERY OOOOOOOOOOOOONE
AnD AyAm3 I wAs JuSt GeTtInG To ThAt AyAm3 . Itb SeEm Tob bi ThAt JaNnebt Jackbson Ids Suei ng JusdTion Foir Seaxsual Harraaxssssssdgment Ansd shdre waaaaadnts mopere odgf ilt .
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Post by TerdBurgler on Feb 3, 2004 23:41:13 GMT -5
Well, after many negotiations with Habba the Jut, we finnaly got the studio back where it belongs. A simple job for a Tiderian Cruiser like his, but I can't believe it cost me my only carbon-encased San Holo. It was such a nice decoration. Well, either way, I bribed a few corrilian fighters to join us in the cause. You would be suprized, but they accept cheetoes as payment. Although these guys are tricky. Can't get the imposter brands past those guys. Anyway, most of the fighters have been sent to Russia, Britain, and South America. And of coarse, a special unit was sent to France being that they surrendered at first sight of frisbee. With luck, the planet will be won back in no time. And as for now, I'm still confused why the aliens have an odd tendency to sit down and cry every 48 hours, followed by 12 hours of extreem brutality. Hmmmmmmmmmm, just like my sister...
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Post by Sparky the Dog on Feb 4, 2004 23:40:26 GMT -5
well terd its a little thing called.........well actually i dont know what its called. but in entertainment news i have a joke for all of our girly alien invaders. ok here it goes.
They call it PMS because Mad Cow Desiease was already taken.
so lets see those alien invaders deal with that. and if they come after me i'll jest tell them that terd dubbed my voice over. now to moero who looks like she is about to kill me for the weather. or to rev for something else i whever he is. or to ayame from the battle in japan. or even to tay who should have never gotten a paid vaction due to the fact he is an intern
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Post by Moero on Feb 5, 2004 14:11:23 GMT -5
*It's true. Moero is this close:| | to killing Sparky.*
You know, I'm beginning to think that joining the aliens' side wouldn't be that bad of an idea.
*glares at the men in the crew through the camera*
Anyway, most of them are suffering from an intense sugar low right now, making it easy enough to pick them off... At least I'm letting them die happy...
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Post by Cat-Girl Ayame on Feb 5, 2004 21:26:01 GMT -5
*inside a Japanese bakery*
Welcome to Newscast ladies and gents!
Ayame here, reporting from...well, I can't tell you because I want to keep it a secret. Suffice to say it is underneath a train station in Japan, and the bread they make here is so good it's ORGASMIC! And not just one of them, ALL OF THEM ARE! Watch. *takes a light colored roll from the pink plastic bag, and takes a bite.*
GASP! *collapses* OH! OH MY G**! *pant* *gasp* *gasp* *stands again on shaky legs*
See what I mean? Anyway, you might notice the large number of aliens behind me. See, to save Tokyo Tower and the rest of my team I had to surrender myself to their army. However, since they don't know the country they are letting me show them around. I've been allowed to report the status of the war over here, but I am not allowed to give you any messages on how to deafeat them so anything I say LOUDLY is not part of the secret. Anyway, I am no longer in TOKYO as you may or may not have guessed. That TOWER outside happens to be the Mitsubishi corperate headquarters. If you head next door from here, you'll see one of the FIVE CELESCTIAL SHRINES which, when they are ENERGIZED cause a great surge of power, which do not GRANT anyone who STANDS ON TOP of a certain brodcast antenna LIMITLESS POWER.
Okay, well back to my bread. I have already spent 34,000,000 Yen here so I need to leave. Ayame, signing out.
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Post by Sparky the Dog on Feb 5, 2004 22:03:17 GMT -5
this just in. due to the information ayame gave us. i have came to the conclusion that ayame is iin a patty cakes bakery "Patty Cakes! Your Bakers Man" look for a store to come to a town near you
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Post by TerdBurgler on Feb 6, 2004 11:28:11 GMT -5
*inside a Japanese bakery* Welcome to Newscast ladies and gents! Ayame here, reporting from...well, I can't tell you because I want to keep it a secret. Suffice to say it is underneath a train station in Japan, and the bread they make here is so good it's ORGASMIC! And not just one of them, ALL OF THEM ARE! Watch. *takes a light colored roll from the pink plastic bag, and takes a bite.* GASP! *collapses* OH! OH MY G**! *pant* *gasp* *gasp* *stands again on shaky legs* See what I mean? Anyway, you might notice the large number of aliens behind me. See, to save Tokyo Tower and the rest of my team I had to surrender myself to their army. However, since they don't know the country they are letting me show them around. I've been allowed to report the status of the war over here, but I am not allowed to give you any messages on how to deafeat them so anything I say LOUDLY is not part of the secret. Anyway, I am no longer in TOKYO as you may or may not have guessed. That TOWER outside happens to be the Mitsubishi corperate headquarters. If you head next door from here, you'll see one of the FIVE CELESCTIAL SHRINES which, when they are ENERGIZED cause a great surge of power, which do not GRANT anyone who STANDS ON TOP of a certain brodcast antenna LIMITLESS POWER. Okay, well back to my bread. I have already spent 34,000,000 Yen here so I need to leave. Ayame, signing out. Hmmmmm, I'm sure I've seen somthing like this before...Hmmmmmmmmm. Oh Yeah! Tenchi Muyo: Tenchi in Love, right? Good show, good show. Not as good as the second, but I'm too much of a Tenchi Guru to care. I got it! I'll do the same thing as the movie! If it works in the movies, it's gotta work in real life, right? Well, I'm off to tokyo. Anyone other than Sparky is free to join me. Good thing I kept that space-ship lying around. *runs into Newscast garage and hops in spaceship named Redfish II* I'm off to imitate a movie!
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Post by Sparky the Dog on Feb 6, 2004 13:33:06 GMT -5
well with everyone else gone i guess i will leave too. i'll just sneak onto terds ship and that will be the end of that.*sparky then runs of to sneak aboard the ship. and succeds*
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